4 once I actually wanted things 2 go right...
but part of me was already aware& somewhat prepared for this battle
knowing we were truly serving in a "BEAUTIFUL-DISASTER"
but I’m viewing it as a minor casualty of war...
wanting to b accepting, and open minded about this ordeal
but again how do u build something stable w/ quicksand as the floor...
my mind is a battle field, I’m confused
fuk I’m torn...
don’t know if I can handle not knowing what lies behind "lovez" door
both parties involved r hopeful
but live their own bitter reality, of being unsure...
sadly who knows which one of us will fold first
surrendering w/ hands held up highly, uttering sadly
"I can’t do this anymore"
confused by uncertainty laced w/ insecurity...
contemplating on what could have happened
if we had just pursued things b4...
b4 we both succumbed 2 loves many debts
could have lived and chilled in ur world
while allowing u 2 view life
and experience "like" through my core
connected by our "lyrical scriptures"
our shared love of spoken word...
intertwining our like-ness
2 create 1 untouchable world
I’m lost
stumblin on my own emotions
insecure feelings and thoughts
b4 I can even formulate our "indiscretions" into mere words
I was,
I ‘AM hopeful in thinking
our "stolen moments" could "evolve" n2 so much more
but instead, I sit here fuming,
burning over my own worthless scribble
shit that is barely recognizable as having any real worth....
can’t quite get my point across, 4give me for my babble...
but it's hard 2 express what’s inside my head
b4 the tape begins 2 unravel
but none-the-less, this is useless nonsense
the end 2 the beginning of a new type of regret...
the kind that leaves u empty
not wishing u hadn’t...
simply that u had sooner
b4 pain, b4 heartache
b4 life turned us both,
into the bitter women that we r
we could have been great together....
making beautiful music beyond closed doors...
yet we rest here in doubt, and clouded judgment...
not knowing if we will ever really figure this
"d squared" thing out.
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